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August 23, 2005

Silver Ring Thing


The Bush administration yesterday suspended a federal grant to the Silver Ring Thing abstinence program, saying it appears to use tax money for religious activities. [...] [Ed: Appears?]

In filings with the Internal Revenue Service, the organization describes its mission as "evangelistic ministry" with an emphasis on "evangelistic crusade planning." [WaPo]


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» Financing for abstinence program cut from Political News and Blog Aggregator
PITTSBURGH — The federal government has cut off money to a nationwide program that promotes ab [Read More]


The headline is NOT, as the Washington Post says, that the Bush administration is witholding tax money from a religious group, but that the Bush administration, as the ACLU claims in court filings, is SPENDING tax dollars on religious prosletyzing.

WAPO is spun again by Rove.

The Ring of Pre-Marital Chastity only works for lawful-aligned characters, and even then, it doesn't really allow them to automatically pass saves against sex: it just provides a +3 bonus to any rolls against it, assuming 3rd edition rules. For neutral and chaotic characters, it's just a piece of jewelry with no magical effects at all.

Lindsay, I don't think I want to know where that ring is supposed to be worn....

1. "Ring Thing"?

2. Epi, I think you've got it backwards. After faith-based initiatives, the gay marriage amendment, abstinence education and now the plugs for ID, it should be a shock that the federal government isn't funding religious activity absolutely EVERYWHERE.

In filings with the Internal Revenue Service, the organization describes its mission as "evangelistic ministry" with an emphasis on "evangelistic crusade planning."

I've analyzed this passage several times, and I still have no idea how anyone could have suspected that they'd use the federal money for proselytizing.

And Mr. Elson, an examination of the organization suggests that the ring is actually a lawful evil cursed item, used to twist the minds of would-be paladins. In addition, the ring is obviously completely ineffective against charm spells cast by married gay couples.

From Whatever It Is, I'm Against It, on the grant being suspended:

"Well I’m sure if the group (“Silver Ring Thing”) respects the federal government, it won’t mind waiting."

From what I've seen as a fed, it's downright shocking that the Bush Administration pulled the

Yeah, the program has a "success" rate of something like 12%. Isn't that good enough for the Bushites?

wow, the ring you have picture is less likely to scare a person off than the one Pam has on her post. I frankly think if they took the one Pam shows and turn it into a chastity, that whole approach to abstinence would work much better (even after the belt is removed, the memories of anyone who saw Jesus on someone's crotch like that would have to have some sort of PTSD to double as post-marital natural family planning)

Lets see what went into the recipe for this mess.

A President who is the lap dog for the religious right.

A faith based initiative where money is given to religious groups whose primary drive in their lives is conversion of the heathen and apostate.

Money is indeed given to such a group.

Poof, money is gone and it went to proselytize people.

Hell, just could not see that one coming could ya.

One ring to rule them all...

This is ring is the source of much republican power. Someone must find the master ring and destroy it, so that it cannot be used to command the bearers of other such rings. It can only be destroyed in the Texas Megachurch from whence it came. Since any of us could fall victim to it's power, we need to find an asexual to wear it, and guide that asexual to the megachurch in texas. We must pass through the Idiots of Kansas, a forest in Utah where a rave is going on, and then cross over into the realm of the redneck sheriffs. Only there, once we have evaded the sweltering 1,000 degree heat and the redneck sherifs, can we find the megachurch. In that megachurch, on an unholy alter, the ring was forged out of the clitorises (clitori?) of victims of genital mutation, the left testicle of every skull and bones member, and some nazi gold from the catholic church. It is there, on that megachurch alter, that Barbara Bush, reading from the necrocomicon and the New Internation Version of the bible, molded the master ring around Ronald Regeans cock, using fire and oil and unicorn blood as Regean, screaming in pain and pleasure, was buttfucked by Nixon. Underneath that unholy alter is a pool of mestrual blood from the virginal bush twins where Ronald Regean stuck his cock as he came and the ring was completed, and only there can the ring be destroyed. This is going to take a ragtag team of underprepared and arguing libertarians, greens, democrats, and four rave kids, lead by the great rationalist wizard James Randi to infiltrate the megachurch and destroy it.

OK I'm done now. I really could go on for hours...

Damnit, Carla, you just beat me too it.


These abstinence clubs actually serve as profoundly sexual for their participants. They do not practice chasity so much as a group exhibitionist fetish.

Dunbar even told his mother. He lasted the longest. "Eight and a half months," he says. I notice he's not wearing one now. He's not embarrassed. Sexuality, he believes, is not a private matter.

It looks like entwined arms and legs. Or turds.

I'm with the entwined arms and legs theory here.

I thought we established a few days ago that the best way to ensure abstinence is to avoid showering. I think I'll start my own "No Shower, No Sex" campaign in the high schools, as soon as I get my federal grant.

For neutral and chaotic characters, it's just a piece of jewelry with no magical effects at all.

Posted by: Julian Elson | 08/24/2005

are ya kidding me? how about this magic effects?

hey baby, Ima virgin wanna dance? :D

Just where do they wear those rings? Do they sell them at The Pleasure Chest?

Did you realize that the ring you have a picture of isn't actually the ring that they give out? No, actually the ring they give out reads 1 Thessalonians 4: 3-4. That verse reads as follows: "God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear from all sexual sin. Then each of you will control your body and live in holiness and honor..."
Is it the fact that it's a Bible verse that's leading these kids that scares you, or is does truly have to do with where your money is going? Just something to think about. I guess we can just be thankful that this group isn't cutting down trees and ruining the environment. Actually, they're really not doing anything harmful.. hmm

"One ring to rule them all..."
That's just what I want to say...

I dont know what it looks like for sure but i do know it has a passage from the bible in it which that pictured one doesn't have. p.s.:... IT WORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(just have faith)

I wrote to this organization:

Subject: what is on my ring??-help! im loosing the respect of outsiders!

I could not find what scripture is actually on the ring on your website. Although I did see the tons of cool marketing products. I did see the special on TV today about the SRT scam. Perhaps they should also read on in 1 Thessalonians "..aspire to live quietly, to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we charged you; so that you may command the respect of outsiders, AND BE DEPENDENT ON NOBODY(yes, this includes the federal gov't funding...) (1 Thessalonians 11-12)
Especially the girl in the program working for you that "doesn't believe in memorizing scripture, it's all different anyway!"(???!)
In addition to teaching kids not to be promiscuous, you should also teach them how not to be marketing whores (such as yourselves...especially melani)
You are the true heathens.

May G-d Forgive, And Help you all.

They wrote back:

Dear ????????,

Thank you for your not so encouraging email. It is however, hard to take someone serious that refuses to sign their name. What are you afraid of?

As for the program, it is obvious that you have no idea what the program is all about. The scripture on the ring is 1 Thes. 4:3-4 "God wants you to be Holy and to stay away from sexual sins. He wants each of you to learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable." God has given us the task of reaching students with this message of abstinence and to present the Gospel of Jesus Christ to a lost world. Rather than tearing down our brothers and sisters in Christ with slanderous words, shouldn't we be encouraging one another, (Love Your Neighbor as Yourself!!!!).

Once again, thank you for your email!!! It lets us know that God is doing something great through our ministry when people like yourself and the aclu get angry at us.

For The Glory OF God,
Steve Phillips
Event Coordinator

Then I said, congrats, your god must be proud.

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