Please visit the new home of Majikthise at

« Ex-FDA chief faces criminal charges | Main | John Kenneth Galbraith dies at 97 »

April 29, 2006

Lester Pearson, Illuminati Tool

Via belledamme222 of Fetch me my axe, what may be one of the greatest crackpot conspiracy theories of all time:

Lester Pearson, Illuminati Tool


TrackBack URL for this entry:

Listed below are links to weblogs that reference Lester Pearson, Illuminati Tool:


I haven't laughed that hard since I read an old Instapundit post about Saddam Hussein attack Iowa with biofuels.

Ever notice how lefty conspiracy theories tend to be all about the CIA, while wingnut conspiracy theories have to be tied into gays, black, Jews, women, masons, the Catholic Church, English Royalty, etc.?

If a conspiracy involves more than half the population, is it a conspiracy, or democracy?

The fools... STILL haven't figured out that Whittaker Chambers' pumpkin was sent from the PAST- the microfilm was simply an identifier. If they had caught on, they could have stopped its eventual transformation into an Edsel, and later to the traveling box that has given Dr. Who power over the UNIVERSE! ^..^

Dear Ms. Beyerstein:

This is only the second comment I have left on your blog, inasmuch as my own words are often nondescript, wanting originality, or incapable of proffering links because I am on dialup. However, here I have something to say, and I hope that it isn't trivial. It probably is, but, as with John Gielgud's commercial where the female guest sings, "Time to make myself beau--tiful," "Hope springs eternal...."

I am actually driven to rage by Masonic conspiracy theories, in no small part because I am the son, grandson, and grand nephew of 32nd Degree Freemasons. While I am not a Freemason myself, I know enough to know that modern Freemasons are wrapped up in the business of charity and moral self-improvement above all other things.

Generally, those prone to Masonic conspiracy theories tend to be Fundamentalists. A few years ago, perhaps even a decade, Pat Robertson proclaimed that he had "heard that John Wilkes Booth was a Freemason, and that the other conspirators in the plot to kill Lincoln were also Freemasons." That turned out to be a clarion call for Fundamentalists to accuse Freemasons of everything from starting Bolshevism to sharing in orgies in the Vatican Basement. My father, surrendering to his early childhood Fundamentalism, joined a very narrow church and began denying he had ever been a Freemason -- apparently the wicked pastor began teaching that Freemasons worshipped Satan, and my father, more desirous of being in the fold than in thinking for himself, betrayed his history, his principles and himself.

The whole matter makes me sick to my stomach. It reminds me of Bacon's first essay where he says that there are those who cling to lies because without them, there would be nothing in their brains whatsoever to keep them from dying from nothingness. It reminds me of JFK assassination conspiracy theorists who had far more ideological than factual axes to grind. And as I have noted on Dailykos under the username DavidR1613, in American Fundamentalism it is impossible to wrong the sinner -- therefore, even breaking the commandments against the sinner is permitted in their perverse logic. Neither Robertson nor his followers care that they have wronged Freemasons, for Freemasons as sinners will be punished by G_d far worse in the afterlife. Can anything a person can do to him in this world match that?

Finally, let us NEVER forget that the novel "Biarritz," a plagiarized novel from which the "Protocols of the Elders of Zion" was itself plagiarized, begins by asserting that "there are Thirty-two Degrees of Jews, headed by a Grand Master," thus uniting in one fell swoop Jews and Freemasons.

These are not just silly loons who buy into Masonic conspiracies -- these are either dangerous psychotics or downright anti-Semites just looking for an excuse to revive the Protocols. This isn't funny in the least.

Well, in fact the guy *is* a raving anti-Semite and a vicious homophobe, so I've got reason to take it rather personally as well--yet somehow, I just can't get that worked up about this one. I'm not sure why. It might be the aliens.

My grandfather was a Mason and a Canadian MP who accompanied Lester Pearson on a United Nations delegation to New York City. I'm also Jewish. I know there's a dark side to these Masonic conspiracy theories, but sometimes the best response is to laugh out loud.

per lefty and righty crackpot paranoiacs: at a certain point it becomes difficult to distinguish them, have you noticed? I mean: David Icke.

ultimately right and left just aren't that important anymore when the whole multiverse (twelve-foot greys and otherwise) are arrayed against you in order to drain you of your precious bodily fluids.

There's a chick on a VC I'm on who's that kind of hateful-funny--lives alone in the middle of a shack somewhere in Buttfuck, Nowhere, from where she types her all-lower-case screeds against George W. Bush and the Republicans (notice this dude also believes the election was stolen), PNAC, which not only is evil for all the usual reasons but conspired to create 9/11 with the *illusion* of planes hitting the buildings (the fools...the mad fools); the ultra rich; the homosexuals (the men because they hate women, the women because they have "co-opted feminism" (hey, we're all *about* the co-ops); the insidious La Raza movement which wants to pollute U.S. precious bodily fluids with swarms of Mexicans; Bill Gates, because he is contributing to the overpopulation of Africa and hence the world with his support for malaria vaccines...she's just 31 flavors of nutty goodness, really. I keep thinking it would be a mitzvah to hook her up with this dude. Two politically paranoid people on a date would be a joy to behold. but how would you ever get them together in the first place?...


I was speaking in general terms. Most people I know who harbor a conspiracy theory hold to one or two pet theories, and don't think about them very much.

But when a person sees a debunking of his pet theory, he has a choice to make: discard the theory, research further, or begin to develop a mindset that will cause him to believe virtually every conspiracy theory he comes across.

From there, it's an easy slide into hoarding canned goods and spending all of your free time looking for more conspiracies. At that point, ideology becomes irrelevant.

But I was speaking of those folks for whom ideology is still important, the ones who think that the CIA killed Kennedy, but can't accept the idea that Clinton had Ron Brown killed. Or the ones who think that Clinton had 50+ individuals assassinated, but find preposterous the notion that the NSA would tap the phone of anyone but a suspected terrorist.

So, anyone here a fan of the game?

Evil Geniuses for a Better Tomorrow was always my favorite, though the Orbital Mind Control Lasers have their charm.

Why should we only be worried about what is going on in the world? Do we alredy know enough to survive, because the Conspiracy theorists paint everything doom and gloom. Should we commit suicide? What is their purpose anyway. I think we should pray and if God is too quiet; like he is to most people. then live on as you find it fit and wait for judgement day. I have read most of that shit on aliens, conspiracies, hollow earth, devil etc...the shit is just too endless. i wonder if most of these people and not just paid propagandists; it makes sense when you look at it that way.

The comments to this entry are closed.