Bush appointee: Promiscuous sex is mind-blowing!
In his ongoing quest to break the government, George Bush tapped Dr. Eric Keroack to oversee Title X funding--the only federal program devoted entirely to family planning and reproductive health.
Dr. Keroack told an abstinence leadership conference that sex causes brain damage. Seriously.
According to Dr. K's CracKpot Theory, "positive social interaction" causes the brain to release oxytocin, which enables you to fall in love. But be careful--sex with too many people is literally mind-blowing because you use up all your oxytocin. Then you can never really love anyone.
Fundies hate sex- especially recreational sex, since they view it as a "sin" rather than the animalistic urge that it is.
Darwin, like Galileo before him, has been banned by the church.
But nothing can prevent nature from taking its course - whether it be heliocentric or evolutionary forces at work.
It's too bad that Rapture is just a childish fantasy for these folks - real people would never miss them.
Posted by: shrike | November 16, 2006 at 01:47 PM
To quote Air Supply:
"I'm all out of love, I've used all my oxytocin on you,
I knew it wasn't right screwing for so long,
I'm all out of love, and now I can't love you,
I know I'm too late, I've been lovin' for way too long,
...
What was I thinking of?
Oh, What was I thinking of?"
Posted by: Count Zero | November 16, 2006 at 01:51 PM
Then Rush Limbaugh must have been doin' it 12 times a day.
Oh, oxytocin, not oxycontin.
Posted by: norbizness | November 16, 2006 at 02:31 PM
I wonder if oxytocins are related to erototoxins. They both sound so scary.
Posted by: zach | November 16, 2006 at 03:08 PM
Rush just loves oxy in general. Remember, he got busted with Viagra without a prescription while on vacation in the Dominican Republic, a place notorious for it's sex trade. No wonder Rush is braindead, he blew his mind out on Dominican prostitutes!
http://www.alternet.org/blogs/peek/38192/
Posted by: Count Zero | November 16, 2006 at 03:10 PM
If I've learned one thing in my brief tenure in medicine, it's that a "Dr." in front of someone's name doesn't mean he doesn't have his head up his ass. Using up your oxytocin? Docta, please.
Oh, oxytocin, not oxycontin.
Not the first to make that mistake. Some med students from Duke told me a (likely apocryphal) story about some thieves who broke into their hospital pharmacy and made off with a couple cases of oxytocin.
I hope they sold it to somebody. "I'm not feeling high at all, but I'm pretty sure I'm going into labor."
Posted by: The J Train | November 16, 2006 at 03:21 PM
a place notorious for it's sex trade.
Actually, a place notorious as the new Thailand, where adult men can go to have sex with poor children at a reasonable price.
Just sayin'.
Posted by: Thomas | November 16, 2006 at 03:28 PM
Y'see, the brain isn't like a truck, it's a series of tubes, tubes with oxytocin in them. And when you wring out every last drop from those tubes... y'see... just come to Jesus, OK?
Posted by: scarshapedstar | November 16, 2006 at 05:16 PM
Liquor is quicker,candy is dandy, but fuckin' won't rot your teeth, although masterbation causes blindness.
Posted by: Undeniable Liberal | November 16, 2006 at 06:17 PM
Dr. Keroack told an abstinence leadership conference that sex causes brain damage.
Damn. I guess I must not be doing it right.
Posted by: Windypundit | November 16, 2006 at 06:19 PM
I would think Dr. Keroack would be a lot more open-minded about sex and free love, especially after he wrote On The Road. Oh wait...never mind.
Posted by: John Lucid | November 16, 2006 at 06:30 PM
Holy shit, Count Zero! I just noticed your Air Supply quote! OMG!!! What are ya trying to do!? Destroy us all!?! I think Google permanently delisted Majikthise after it scanned your reference to that pure, unmitigated evil from Down Under. I may not know if good and evil actually exist, but I can sure as shit tell you that singing, quoting, or even humming ANYTHING by Air Supply is considered a crime against humanity. Don't do it again, or I'll have to contact The Hague.
Posted by: John Lucid | November 16, 2006 at 06:39 PM
What a total Yabeau! I've had plenty of oxytocin during pregnancy and breastfeeding, and when I hug my son or kiss my husband, my body makes more. I am guessing that if there is any brain damage going around, it is the good Doctor who got it and I am betting it wasn't oxytocin poisoning or deprivation.
Posted by: Hawise | November 16, 2006 at 06:41 PM
The doctor is conflating the purported oxytocin depletion, of which there is no evidence, with the evident brain damage caused by autoerotic asphyxia. He apparently does not realize that his own masturbatory habits are not what the rest of us mean by "promiscuous sex," a term the rest of us use to mean partnered sex with many different partners.
Posted by: Thomas | November 16, 2006 at 06:58 PM
What's next, appointing Peter Deusberg to the AIDS commission?
Posted by: SLC | November 16, 2006 at 07:51 PM
So, by that logic the Duggar lady with the 16 kids is just like a totally strung out junkie trying and trying to get a fix, but she can't because she used it all up, like, 12 kids ago.
So all her crotchfruit after that are mere byproducts of chasing a high.
Posted by: Jonathan Hendry | November 16, 2006 at 08:37 PM
Dr. Keroack told an abstinence leadership conference that sex causes brain damage.
But only if you're not married.
The wedding ring has magical powers.
Posted by: zuzu | November 16, 2006 at 10:44 PM
Cracking up at all these, especially CZ's post-that-must-not-be-named.
>What a total Yabeau!
Is that a homonym for Yobbo? Love it!
Regarding the topic, it reminds me of Barbara Bush's comment: "Young people have to realize that sex is... death!"
Comedian Will Durst really chewed her up for pulling that boner.
Posted by: 1984 Was Not a Shopping List | November 16, 2006 at 10:52 PM
This'll apply to the unspeakable Ted Haggard, as well, will it?
Posted by: G. Tingey | November 17, 2006 at 04:05 AM
Lol, from over here in Norway, the US looks like a madhouse. Where do you find these people? How do they get power? Its just amazing.. //rueful shaking of head//.
I love the hair.
Posted by: Martin K | November 17, 2006 at 08:51 AM
"Regarding the topic, it reminds me of Barbara Bush's comment: "Young people have to realize that sex is... death!"
Comedian Will Durst really chewed her up for pulling that boner"
Isn't there some other way, any other way, that you could have possibly phrased this?
Posted by: Ledasmom | November 17, 2006 at 11:24 AM
So that's what's wrong with me!
Posted by: Dicky Neely | November 17, 2006 at 02:48 PM
>Comedian Will Durst really chewed her up for pulling that boner"
>Isn't there some other way, any other way, that you could have possibly phrased this?
Oh, mais non! Purposefully, knowingly, evilly did I plan that. Well, actually, I shouldn't have used the word "chewed."
Posted by: 1984 Was Not a Shopping List | November 17, 2006 at 03:20 PM
Does masturbation cause Oxytocin depletion. (if is does, I'm in serious trouble)
Oh wait, that just causes blindness, right?
The trouble with using such scare tactics, is that fear doesn't improve self-control or make a person more moral. That’s why abstinence only programs tends to fail in the long term.
Posted by: George Arndt | November 17, 2006 at 04:30 PM
Dr. Keroack is a superb appointment with a strong track record as a thoughtful, compassionate and effective leader for positive social change.
Posted by: b.d.g. | November 19, 2006 at 08:10 AM